Further Defining the Roles: What Do We Do?

So, we understand that we are created equal, but we have different roles. We get that we are to submit and our husbands are to lead. But there's more. Headship and submission is the overarching concept that applies to our gender roles. But your womanly role itself is not simply to "do whatever, just do it in a submissive way." Thankfully, the Bible, which has everything we need for life and godliness, tells us specifically what our roles are as men and women. What do we do...practically speaking?

Well, to find our answer let's begin at the beginning. In Genesis 3 we see that Adam and Eve have sinned and God curses their roles. Did you catch that? God does not curse men and women; he curses the role of the man and the women. The roles that were once natural and easy for them to fulfill are now, because of their sin, going to be difficult.

So, to figure out what our roles are, we need only to look at the curses. When we read how the woman and man were respectively cursed, we will see what their role is. Easy as that! We find the curses in Genesis 3:16-19.

-God cursed the woman in childbirth: "I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing" (3:16)
-God cursed the woman in child-rearing: "in pain you shall bring forth children" (3:16)The Hebrew word here refers not only to birthing but to bringing up children as well.
-God cursed the woman in her relationship with her husband: "Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you." (3:16) The Hebrew here is not a positive desire, but rather a sinful desire against the husband or to rule over the husband.

So we can see from the curses that a woman's primary God-ordained role is nurturer and helper. Her primary role is to bear and raise children and to help her husband. Because of sin, this role is now difficult. Childbearing will be painful. Child-rearing will be painful, figuratively. Instead of wanting to help and submit to her husband, she is now going to have to battle a sinful desire to rule over her husband.

Let's look at a couple of other passages in the New Testament (emphasis mine):

Titus 2:4-5
"[...] and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled."

1 Timothy 5:9-10, 14
"Let a widow be enrolled if she is not less than sixty years of age, having been the wife of one husband, and having a reputation for good works: if she has brought up children, has shown hospitality, has washed the feet of the saints, has cared for the afflicted, and has devoted herself to every good work.[...]So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander."

The message of these passages is right in line with Genesis 3. The primary life focus of a woman is to help her husband and nurture her children (the helping/nurturing applies to single women and girls, too...we'll get to that later). The epicenter of these tasks is the home, which she is to manage. This is God's design and command for us as women. As such, we must order our lives in such a way that we are not hindered in any way in accomplishing these tasks.

So, what about the man? Well, when we flip back to Genesis 3 we see that God cursed the man's work. (Let's get this straight, now: Work itself was not the curse. Man worked before sin. However, before sin work was delightful and enjoyable.) We read in Genesis 3:17-19, as a result of sin, man's work will be difficult. Psalm 104:23 says: "Man goes out to his work and to his labor until the evening." We won't spend much time talking about the man right now. Basically, what you need to know is that based on Genesis 3 and the word and example of the rest of the counsel of God's word, a man's role is to protect and provide (work...gainful labor...a job).

Tomorrow we'll go one step further and make the application even more practical. We'll discuss what it looks like to nurture your kids, help your husband, and manage your home.

Suggested Reading: Womanly Dominion by Mark Chanski and Manly Dominion by Mark Chanski